The Village Oddness
by Carla Tiara
Summary: This was inspired by the Ring Oddness by Karasu'sHistaricalToaster. Sorry I used the name, I will change it if you want.I actually hate this movie. But it and the ring, sadly are my only horror movies, and I wanted to make a stupid funny, horror parody.
1. The lizard named Joey!

Ok, no I do not own the village, actually I hated that movie. But if I did own it I'd be rich. And I'd like to be rich! If I were rich I could buy Inuyasha DVDs, and a tablet, and a MP3 player, and a karioke machine, and a Dance Dance Revolution, and... Nope, that's it. Maybe I would buy the ring! Then I would be rich! Wait, I would allready be rich! Hooray! Richness!

Oh yeah, and this was inspired by Karasu'sHistaricalToaster(or some name like that)'s The Ring Oddness, which is the best story in the ff.n world. I was reciting lines from it before I'd even read it. (I hadn't read it because I hadn't seen the ring yet, and I was reciting lines because my freind, Fang told them to me! And they're funny!) And that story taught me to valuable lessons! 1 is that sharpies smell GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2 is that Sporks are pointy! YAY POINTY SPORKS!

Scene 1: there's a picture of a forest playing the barbie girl song in slow motion really, really low, everytime you think it will finally end and put you out of your missery it gets higher and faster, and more annoying. Soon it seams to stop, but really it's just so high pitched no one can hear it anymore and a pack of dogs come in barking loudly. No one knows when the song ends because no one can hear it anymore. Suddenly it changes from a full moon to broad daylight and all of the dogs turn back into their natural form, humans, except for one named Joey who turns into a lizard.

Audience: WTF?

camera moves to show 2 teen age girls dressed in middle-agey dresses, getting kicked out of their house and being told to clean the porch.

Parents, or whoever: throws 2 brooms at them

girls: start stripping off their clothes to reveal layer after layer of clothes, finally ending identical hot pink miniskirts with tie-dyed white spots and sky blue tank-tops with pictures of scooby-doo on them

Girl 1: Starts to sweep, then starts spinning around with the broom, then starts drooling and spraying the other girl.

Girl 2: sees a bunch of flowers picks them up and puts them in her hair.

Creepy monster dudes who they are all afraid of: runs up.

Girl 1: tries to bat the monster off.

Girl 2: Oblivious... O-B-L-I-V-I-O-F-D-G-Y-H-Sljkhlkjhlkjashdf! I wonder what that spells...

monster: kills girl 2 brootally and getting her blood everywhere, then leaves.

Randome stranger: snatches red flowers from her hair.

Girl 2: Gee, that's the bad color! We must barry it! snatches it back, then forgets what she's doing and puts them back in her hair

Stranger: snatches them again and barries them

the following has been written by my rat:

p

HOORAY RATTIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That scene was totally short, I know. But I'm gonna post it and see what kind of results I get. Hopefully I will post the next one soon.


	2. YAY RED STUFF!

TWO REVEIWS!!!! I don't understand them, but, at least they are review! W/e.

rainbowbrite84: I love that rat! But she's not actually mine, she's my brother's, and her name is Stripe! Oh, and anlso I like coffee! But I get hyper off of good ol' fashioned sugar! And sometimes other people's hyperness!!

Er... Other person: What? You're mean! I don't like you!

I owe a little of this chapter to futurama, School of rock, Robin Hood, Men in tights, The Fairly Odd Parents, and Harry Potter! But just a little. YAY! Anyhoop! Let's get it started (ha, or hot or w/e that word it) let's get it started (in here)!

Scene 2: There are some people gathered around something that you haven't a clue what it is, so be quiet and leave me alone!!!!!!!!

Thing that everyone is looking at: I am a little toy sheep who has been shaved and I have a lollypop in my mouth! lick lick

Annoying, little boy 1: Wow! It can talk to the audience!

boy 2: We have an audience?

Slightly more sencible boy: Good god! It's licking a lollypop!

Really, really, stupid, annoying, little boy: the stupidest tone of voice imaginable It's a giiiiiiiiiiirl sheepie!

Dead toy sheep thing: winks at boy

Some gender confused girl: OHMIGAWD! We're all boys here!

Everyone: stares at her

super, talking-dog man: superhero style voice How come the cheif or w/e guy hasn't said anything yet?

Cheif or w/e guy: Yeah, why haven't I? sits back in his chair and flips the next page of his porno mag.

His wife: OHMIGAWD!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?! looks Ooh! Can I see too? snuggles in next to him

All the children: are disgusted

Ivy: eye twitches C'mon kids, RUN! RUN AWAY FROM THE CRAZY PEOPLE! They do happen to be my parents... Wait... I don't have a mother! o.O

Ivies parents: thumpah thumpah thumpah

Ivy: EW! Quite desturbing!

Stupid, Annoying, Perverted, little boys: OOOOOOOH!!!!!!! O.O

Boy 1: It's SO BEAUTIFUL!

Mother: gets struck by lightning and dies

Father: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Ivy: Oh! So NOW I don't have a mother! I see!

Father: I'm over it! sits back and turns the next page of his porno mag.

Ivy: sheepheards all the sick little boys away from her father's prono mag.

Boys: punch her

Lizard named Joey: starts humping boy 1's legs

Boy 1: AHH! I though we got rid of him in the opening credits!

Boy 2: We had opening credits!

Boy 1: Damn! Did I say that out loud?

Noah: starts humping Ivy's leg

Ivy: Oh god! shakes him off I should stab him... Let's just hope he doesn't stab my fiance whom I don't have yet first! laughs histerically

suddenly they are all at some kind of council meeting or something, I'm skipping school, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Randome living thing, it can talk, because I want it to!: No YOu aReN"""T! 0H! NoI''"'"m nNOTAn0oB!

Auther: Fine!

people are suddenly at school now, but only the little kids

teacher: Blah blah blah algibra!

Student 1: We're in 1st grade! No algibra!

Teacher: Blah blah blah! Math Blah blah spelling!!!!

Student 2: here, listen to my teacher translater device!

Student 1: Please repeat everything you just said!

Teacher: I said "You know what did that to the poor little stuffed rat... Erm I mean live sheep!" And then you said, "We're in 1st grade! Blah blah reasess!" And then I said "Blah blah blah! Math Blah blah spelling!!!!"

Student 3: Yeah! it was that creepy whispering girl, Ivy's sister who said "Don't let them in!" Later on in the script!

Student 1: You can speak teacher?

student 2: You understood him? Wow! That means it also works on geeks!

Teacher: I'm bored! You may leave now! Blah! goes away muttering I wonder if cheif or w/e guy will loan me his porno mag.

ok, ok so NOW they're all at some kinda meeting thingy. And anyway they talk about what did that to the toy sheep. And then Lusious says he wants to go to the "towns" to get medecine, and everyone says no. And then all of the elders take off their clothes to reveil laundere (do you really expect me to spell that right?) and start breakdancing and making out with each other.

Ivy's sister: So you aren't worried about "THEM"?

Her dad: No.

Ivy's sister: Then what do you wanna talk about?

Dad: Ummmm... Maralen Manson?

Daughter: Who's that?

Dad: Oh yeah! We're living in the middle ages now... Heh heh... sweat droplets Then lets talk about who you're in love with. You know the guy who you didn't tell me you loved?

Daughter: You knew?

Dad: Knew what?

Daughter: That I'm in love!

Dad: How would I know that?

Daughter: sigh apperates herself to right in front of wherevere the hell Lucious, if that is his real name is. She expected a barn. But found herself right outside a burger king. YUMMY! walks in Lucious I love you! I had a whole speech prepared but I think this will work better! starts making out with him

Lucious: You're tacky and I hate you!

Daughter: starts sleeping with him

Lucious: Gee! I was gonna propose to your sister. But I'm kinda having second thoughts!

Daughter: apperates back to her house and starts crying for absolutely no reason at all

somehow they're at some kinda dinner or somthing, I think someone's getting married.

Noah: starts beating up a ten-month old

Ten-month old: beats Noah up

Ivy: la la la la la! It goes around the world, lalalalala! It's all around the world! Lalalalala and everybody's singin'!

Ten-month old: PUNISH NOAH! HE HURTED MY TOESIES!

Ivy: Wow! calls Rachel from the ring Can I have a cream puff?

Rachel: NO!

Ivy: You're not nice! hangs up

Ten-month old: recites an entire episode of futurama

Noah: WTH?

Ivy: punishes Noah

Noah: You're supposed to try and make a deal with me!!!!!!

Ivy: No I'm not!

Noah: YES YOU ARE!

Ivy: NO I'M NOT!

Noah: Check the script!

Ivy: checks the script Ok w/e. I don't really care!

Boy 2: We have a script?

Ivy: goes into the village, and picks red flowers

Well his name is Lucious but... I'm gonna call him Bob-Joe-Efington!: Lalalala! And now the bells are ringin'

Ivy: WOAH! I might possibly have sung that song in the past!

Lucious/Bob-Joe-Efington: HOORAY!

Ivy: You have a haze, your color is aqua- oops, I mean stop asking your color!

Lucious/Bob-Joe-Efington: Hey, WTF? I have a haze? You mean you can't see me me?

Ivy: NO! I'm blind!!!!!! walks into a bunch of trees YAY! TREES!

Lucious (sorry to b so confusing... Actually, I'm really not!): YAY! BLINDNESS!

Ivy: YAY! RED STUFF!

Lucious: No! You are wearing the bad color in your hair!

Ivy: I know that perfectly well! Let me get brutally eaten by monsters if I want to!

Lucious: YAY! DIEING!

Ivy: HOORAY!

Noah: appears in a poof of smoke stab's Bob-Joe-Efington

Ivy: No, no! You don't do that entill later!

Noah: checks the script hey, your right! gives her red barries

Ivy: YAY! MORE RED STUFF!

Bob/Lucious: Hey Ivy, let's get married!

Noah: stab stab stab

Lucious/Bob: STOP DOING THAT!

Ivy's sister: apperates Hey! You don't propose to her yet! none of this stuff is supposed to be going on yet! Here, the stupid auther skipped this whole part!

Stupid Auther: What whole part?

Ivy's siste: This one points to storyboard

Stupid auther: NO I DIDN'T! Here, see! Lucious just proposes and then nothing happens! Leave me alone! Damn pop music!

Ivy's sister (aka daughter): What?

My rate: p

Everyone in this part:YAY RATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A/N: Ok, Doc M, you asked for it, you got it. This next part was written entirely by Stripedy!

Stripe:

Me: C'mon, do something!

Stripe:

Me: W/e. I guess you liked that more then the part I wrote anyway! :'(


End file.
